To whom should I depend on

I've been staring the screen for quite some time now. It's the first day of the week - Monday it is. I haven't felt the blues yet instead I am so eager to be at work today and patiently wait for any jobs which require my help. (To my seniors, kindly give this intern of yours some work please!)

The first few days when my internship period started last four months, I was left in devastation. It was quite difficult to cope with something new, something I have to encounter for the first time in my life. My nature of working requires me to travel a lot - mostly around Kuala Lumpur area. It was scary and I was in fear to jalan everywhere all alone - without my parents, for the first time ever in my life. I fought back hard - I must overcome this fear of mine. I learnt the real deal of survival. At that point of time, I know the fact that I have no one here, I know nobody around and verily all I have is Allah. The One who guides me and protects from any harms and dangers.

I always have this thought, there is always a slight possibility for something undesired can happen to me but Alhamdulillah, I leave everything to Him and believe He has His eyes on me wherever I am. I told my dad, when I was here all alone without you, I'm helpless but the Faith within me had strengthened me to believe to I am never alone - He is with me even closer than my jugular vein. I am scared but I faced off everything I had to with perseverance, that also as per His willingness. I can't always be in my safety zone, I want to explore the world as much as I can. Along the route, I might slipped, tampered and being hurt, but it is something I must go through in life.

I know this challenge of mine is just a small matter to some. But for someone who have been under the full care and protection of her parents plus she is a an introvert kind of a person - it's a huge matter to actually nurture her self-confidence and also in terms of Faith in God. This has taught me a lot on the topic of dependency, on whom should I depend on at all times, not only in certain situations. This is something we have to keep working on - when we are surrounded by our loved ones, we feel secured and sometimes even forgot of The One who gives us that feeling of security.

The kind of life I am currently living is something I had never imagined of when I was a fifteen-year-old girl. What future holds is something that we never been granted to know of, hence, it sparks curiosity and excitement in me.

TO  you, always feel loved, protected and guided at all times.

Best wishes,

   Khalis